The Twilight Awards: Directory & Calendar of Twific Contests, Awards, & News

BEFORE YOU LEAVE A REVIEW

I’ve been obsessed with Twilight fanfiction for quite some time now, and I’ve started following my favorite authors on forums, Facebook, and Twitter.  Know what I learned?  We need to think about the reviews we’re leaving.

1.  These people have real lives.  They write because they enjoy it, and they post because we enjoy it.  The other day I was checking in on one of my favorite fics, and it’s been forever since there was an update.  So just for kicks I started reading some of the reviews.  I was shocked by how many said things like “C’mon already! It’s been two weeks! Update!” and “I really need to know when you’re going to update again or if this is even worth my time.  Please respond.”  Sadly, the author did respond.  From her internet enabled phone.  From the hospital!  Frankly, I hope the reviewer felt like shit.  Me?  I felt like a little more research.  And what I found was that a good number of the top authors in the fandom have actual lives and real problems.  They have special needs kids, spouses with serious medical problems, cars that break down, jobs that are laying people off, and a whole host of other issues that take up most of their free time.  They deal with relationships, divorces, shitty bosses, and real life problems just like the rest of us do.  We as readers are not entitled to regular updates.  We are privileged to read the fantastic writing of some very talented people who choose to give us a little of their spare time.

2.  Happily ever after is not guaranteed.  I was also surprised at how many reviewers insist on knowing if Bella is going to end up with Edward.  There are plenty of great romances out there, and there’s also plenty of tragedy.  If you’re only interested in one kind of pairing, read the summary before you get into the story.  And if the summary doesn’t make it clear, chances are the author wants that to be a mystery.  Don’t like mysteries?  There are currently thousands of other fics you can choose from.  Better yet, buy a book instead.  That way you can flip to the back (you know you did it with New Moon; don’t even try to deny it) and see if it ends the way you want. 

3.  Authors Notes aren’t always pleasant.  Know why?  Because dozens, or even hundreds of people leave unpleasant reviews.  And I don’t mean unpleasant as in “I don’t like your writing.” I mean unpleasant as in “You need to update faster,” “When are they gonna have sex already?!” and “This chapter was too short.”  Try receiving about a hundred of those comments and see how you react.  These authors are devoting their own personal time to writing their own personal take on something, and more often than not, we as readers simply demand more.  Honestly, I’m surprised some of them even bother posting.  So before you take offense because an author went on a rant, think about why they did.  If you weren’t the one who flamed them, skip on down to read the new chapter.  It’s not aimed at you.  And if it is aimed at you, going off on them again isn’t going to help your case.

4.  M doesn’t equal lemons.  In my ‘research’ I came across a review that really shocked me.  The reader went off on a tangent about how the fic was rated M and the author needs to hurry up with the lemon.  Here is the definition of an M Rating:  ‘Not suitable for children or teens below the age of 16 with possible strong but non-explicit adult themes, references to violence, and strong coarse language.’ By that definition, lemons shouldn’t even be allowed, as they are definitely explicit.  That aside, it’s clear that M can also just mean violence or the inclusion of the word “fuck.”  So if it’s lemons you’re looking for, don’t count on M being a guarantee for it.  It covers a lot more than just sex.  This is another case where reading the summary first would be helpful.

5.  Bad reviews = laughter.  So you ranted and raved at an author because you didn’t like their chapter.  Know what they did?  They laughed about it.  And then everyone else in the Twitter-verse joined in and made fun of you.  Why?  Because you used text-speak, misspelled several words, and were entirely too upset about a simple piece of amateur fiction.  Maybe you hurt their feelings for about three seconds, but I guarantee you about 50 other people jumped in and told them how amazing their writing is and how stupid your review was.  If you really want the author to take you seriously, be constructive, keep your emotions out of it, and use spell-check.  They’ll turn a blind eye to you if all you do is attack.  They might listen if it sounds like you have something useful to say.

6.  Fanfic is a hobby, not a profession.  Sure, there are a handful of fanfic authors who want to break into professional writing.  But the vast majority of them are just having fun.  I know of one who was a published writer and gave it up.  I know of another who got an offer for publishing and turned it down.  And I’ll bet there are lots more just like them.  So before you offer them advice on what they could do better if they want to make it in the publishing world, find out if they even care about that.  Otherwise, all your helpful words are simply wasted.  And let's be realistic here.  If you're not a literary publisher, agent, or editor, should they really be taking career advice from you?

7.  Your opinion isn’t everything.  A few months ago, I read a book that was nothing short of awful.  It came highly recommended by several friends, the author is mega-famous, and it was a best seller.  It sucked royally.  I kept thinking it would get better, and in the end I just wondered why I’d wasted my time.  Did I drop a letter in the mail demanding that the publisher give me my money back?  No.  Did I go to the author’s fan site and give her a piece of my mind?  No.  Did I tell everyone I knew how awful it was?  No.  Because thousands of others love it, and my dissatisfaction doesn’t hold a candle to that.  But it seems we’ve placed fanfiction on a whole different plane.  We assume that our opinion is something more than just a statement of preference.  That little review button tempts us to think we are professional reviewers, and we take full advantage of that.  Just one click, and suddenly we are the most important people in the world, and everyone should listen to us.  Yes, the fanfic authors put themselves out there by posting publicly, but they’re not asking for demands and verbal abuse.  There are a lot of readers that need to take it down a notch.

8.  Writers aren’t conceited jerks who only socialize within cliques.  I’m sure you’ve noticed that many top authors chat with other top authors.  They do it for the same reason you hang out with certain friends.  These are the people who understand them and support them.  It doesn’t mean they are snobs.  It just means that’s who they are comfortable with.  If you want to be included, reach out to them.  Follow them on Twitter and respond to their tweets.  Leave them regular reviews so they recognize your screen name.  They’re like that cute guy at the coffee shop.  If you talk to them enough, they’ll notice you. 

Obviously we all love our fanfiction, and thank God there’s so much of it out there for us to read.  But we need to remember who we are and who the writers are.  We’re all fans of the Twilight universe, and we’re all here for a little entertainment.  If someone writes a story you like, thank them.  If they don’t, move on.  If you want to give them advice, word it as advice and not criticism.  Think about what you’d say to a friend if you were offering an opinion on something they put a lot of effort into.  Would you say, “That’s the worst shit I’ve ever seen?”  God, I hope not.

For those of you who must know, I’m Mallory, known as “justmallory” on most sites.  I don’t write fanfiction because I can’t ever stick with an idea long enough, but I greatly appreciate all the wonderful authors who do.